Beware: Kids at work

Over the years, I have come to realize how childish people are when they are actually at work. People take the workspace rather personally and forget that they were are just employees and the organization doesn't owe or own them. That the manager is not their mother and the workplace is not their home. That they are only professionally related to their colleagues and not through relationships.

I have noted how people take everything and everyone personally and ruin the office decorum which is supposed be the office environment free of all the emotions. With the tactical team of HR professionals trying their best to make the employees feel at home, the poor workers do take their word for it. Home is where you can be free, home is where you can move around unhampered, home is where you can be naked.

Skype: Eulogy

Ooh Skype, I loved you. I loved you for your originality and your fantastic quality video calls. I loved you for being so low on ads and I loved you for what you did best-near perfect audio.

And now after being chased by Google and Yahoo, you end up in Microsoft's arms. Not that I do not like the company that Bill Gates started but why were you so desperate to be sold. You were a phenomenon, Skype.

I know you will survive and you will evolve. But you will no longer be Spiderman. You will be the dark Spiderman. You will be full of ads and you will mean business. You will support issues and you will crash.

But I guess all good things come to an end, huh? Only I can never imagine something as good as you can come to an end (virtually, as in losing your individuality) for a mere 8 billion dollars? Did you realize you broke 8 billion hearts?

But I hope Microsoft takes good care of you. And I hope you still manage to survive for what you stood for-Quality. I hope you still manage to keep lovers' hearts united, friends bonded and siblings loved. For you Skype were one of the most benevolent software of our times.

I hope..I so hope

Critique-aly yours

If there is no dearth of something ever in life, it is critique. There will always be critics waiting to gobble up your best effort and spit out such powerful words of contempt, you will feel ashamed you even tried.

The point however is whether you should give into critics. One way of looking at it is to take it as positive feedback and try to inculcate what the so called gurus point out to you. Ooh ya, take the feedback positively and  change your style. For what and for whom? Why should I change my style or anything just because some people feel so.

Building Life’s data marts:

In continuation to my earlier post on A data warehouse called Life, let’s try to build small data marts for life’s departments.

A data mart by its ideal definition is a subset of the data warehouse which is oriented for specific business lines or teams. What this means is that while the data warehouse would be storing data for the entire enterprise, a data mart would have data relevant only to specific businesses within the organization. A marketing team would have no use of HR data and vice versa. Likewise for our architecture for the data warehouse called Life.

A data warehouse called life

A data warehouse, simply put is a vast storage of all relevant data available within an enterprise. And why a storage place for data is the next question that probably pops up. Its because data invariably brings out trends. A technical analyst scans huge amounts of data to find a pattern in stock movements. A marketing professional needs data to understand customers' interest in a product. Data is imperative to any business. And hence the next step to a data warehouse is Business Intelligence.

The dog gets his due

In persuasion to my last discussion about how women can very magically turn men into dogs, I realized that they can again turn them back into humans, emotions et all. Men and emotions? you ask but yes. Ask a man who has been ditched and you will realize how full of emotions men are.

And so did our man. Who had recently been transformed into a dog by his loyalty to a particular lady. When he finally decided to express his feelings for her, he was expectedly turned down. But the dog in him won. And though visibly hurt he still managed to play doggie for another day.

Finding peace

How often do I hear,"all I need is peace". Its everywhere. The dialogue seems to have embedded itself on everyone's tongue. Everybody is cribbing about the lack of peace. And at the same time, they are all running away from it. Everytime I hear someone cribbing, I ask them to define peace.

Of women and dogs

Its wonderful to see how a woman can have as many dogs as she pleases. There is no dearth of men always wanting to be wrapped around the little finger of a pretty lady. As long as the lady knows how to play. All she has to do is throw a ball and the dog will be only too eager to fetch it for her.

One such recent example has been that of a colleague completely enamored by a fresh joinee. He will wait for her for lunch, he will have a late breakfast if she is late for office and even wait for her outside the women's rest room. Once the star performer in the project, he is now the laughing matter of the entire team. His performance is below par and he has gone from being a 'like' to a 'dislike' among the team. And why wouldn't it be. All he has time for is his 'good friend'.