“Why does it always rain on me” is a wonderful song by Travis which near about sums up what goes on in the mind of the quintessential loser. The word “loser” seems to be a favorite with the rock bands. Almost every rock star worth his guitar has penned a song pledging allegiance to that singular word. The word however is not very acceptable in social or corporate circles. You cannot be a loser. “You can win” blares out a self help book while another teaches you how to be a good leader. Always win, always lead, never follow and never ever lose.
As we lap up these books and mop up the music, what we fail to realize is the true meaning of losing. My nephew having scored badly in his second grade exams was audience to a lengthy lecture by his mother. After having enlightened the tender mind towards the shame of not standing first in class, his mother decided on punishing him by not letting him out to play. As both uncle and nephew sat down to a day without TV, I was tempted to ask him why he did not fare well. Speaking behind a waterfall of tears, he replied that he had done his best. The guy before him was just better. Coming from a mind so fresh, the answer seemed so wonderfully true and believable. Isn’t this the perfect retort to all the constant bickering about winning? “The guy ahead of me was just better.”
Constant conditioning has brought us to a condition wherein winning is all that matters. Richard Branson is a winner and so is Stephen Hawking. Who has heard of VInayak Gole? No one! But does that make him a loser? Mr. Branson is just better. When we realize this simple fact that there will be always someone better than us will we be able to decode this puzzle of losing. Losing is just a relative term which tends to compare a group of people. How can someone be a quintessential loser then? Or for that matter a Born Loser? Is it correct to brand somebody a loser simply because luck has not been favoring him?
Again, the answer to all these questions is: No. All of us have a place in this world and a role to play in the divine scheme of things. A winner can never win without the loser losing. So essentially, a winner can never be a winner without a loser. A loser is essentially the one who makes the winner a winner. So why, then are we so ruthless towards losers? Why the punishment and the ridicule? Why the competition to succeed? Isn’t the loser an alter ego of the winner? Like Dr.Jekyll and Mr.Hyde. Maybe. But then we have always adored the winners. Perhaps the feeling of winning over someone is one of the last few strands that connect us to our animal ancestry. Perhaps its years and years of social conditioning that makes us always adore the winners and pity or ridicule the losers. If the world really needs to be flat, it needs to understand that both the winner and the loser are at par. Both need to co-exist and hence need to enjoy the same social stature. Without the loser, the winner cannot exist. It’s not always imperative to win. It’s just as essential to lose once in a while, at least to maintain balance. The loser’s prerogative is not just losing but also maintaining balance in this world.
As we lap up these books and mop up the music, what we fail to realize is the true meaning of losing. My nephew having scored badly in his second grade exams was audience to a lengthy lecture by his mother. After having enlightened the tender mind towards the shame of not standing first in class, his mother decided on punishing him by not letting him out to play. As both uncle and nephew sat down to a day without TV, I was tempted to ask him why he did not fare well. Speaking behind a waterfall of tears, he replied that he had done his best. The guy before him was just better. Coming from a mind so fresh, the answer seemed so wonderfully true and believable. Isn’t this the perfect retort to all the constant bickering about winning? “The guy ahead of me was just better.”
Constant conditioning has brought us to a condition wherein winning is all that matters. Richard Branson is a winner and so is Stephen Hawking. Who has heard of VInayak Gole? No one! But does that make him a loser? Mr. Branson is just better. When we realize this simple fact that there will be always someone better than us will we be able to decode this puzzle of losing. Losing is just a relative term which tends to compare a group of people. How can someone be a quintessential loser then? Or for that matter a Born Loser? Is it correct to brand somebody a loser simply because luck has not been favoring him?
Again, the answer to all these questions is: No. All of us have a place in this world and a role to play in the divine scheme of things. A winner can never win without the loser losing. So essentially, a winner can never be a winner without a loser. A loser is essentially the one who makes the winner a winner. So why, then are we so ruthless towards losers? Why the punishment and the ridicule? Why the competition to succeed? Isn’t the loser an alter ego of the winner? Like Dr.Jekyll and Mr.Hyde. Maybe. But then we have always adored the winners. Perhaps the feeling of winning over someone is one of the last few strands that connect us to our animal ancestry. Perhaps its years and years of social conditioning that makes us always adore the winners and pity or ridicule the losers. If the world really needs to be flat, it needs to understand that both the winner and the loser are at par. Both need to co-exist and hence need to enjoy the same social stature. Without the loser, the winner cannot exist. It’s not always imperative to win. It’s just as essential to lose once in a while, at least to maintain balance. The loser’s prerogative is not just losing but also maintaining balance in this world.
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